Many Germans are all about "looking the part" and appearing to have it all pulled together.
So much so, that those who work as maids will often wear nice clothes on public transportation, change into their work clothes at work, and back into their nice clothes for the bus ride home.
The same is seen in the gym- people come in after work in their work clothes, change into workout clothes, and then put back on their work clothes (If these people always showered in between, I would get it, but many do not since I am at the cheap gym where you have to pay to use the showers.). All because those clothes aren't appropriate for going out.
My in-laws are similar, dressing up to see one another- all the time- and criticizing us if we don't.
I hope I never overrate appearances, because there is so much you just don't see.
The hurt of someone who has just lost a loved family member, the worry of someone rushing off to an interview, the depression of someone struggling with the disease, all of these things can be hidden by looking "normal" or "ordentlich" (orderly). It is so freeing to know that it doesn't matter what appears- you may be a "straight-looking" woman who gets weird looks at bars and clubs when you are with your wife- but YOU know who YOU are and often, appearances don't reflect that.
Right now, I appear to be putting all of my energy into work, but I am holding back in the hopes that the bloodwork they drew today will let me know on Friday that we can begin trying to become pregnant again. And that's where I need my energy.